Why does my partner feel appreciated when I don't say much?

They likely have acts-of-service as a primary love language. Words feel empty without corresponding action; actions without words feel like obligation. They interpret "I love you" proven through effort—cooking, fixing things, problem-solving. Your words are nice; your actions are proof.

How do I get my action-focused partner to say more?

Ask explicitly and normalize it. "I need to hear that you care about me, not just see it. Can you tell me once a week?" Most acts-of-service partners are happy to verbalize once they understand it matters. Frame it as a need, not a criticism of their actions.

Can I express my love language while learning theirs?

Absolutely. You can say affirmations AND do acts of service. The key is understanding which language your partner actually receives as love. Give both—your natural expression (affirmations) plus their primary need (actions). This prevents resentment on both sides.