Question 1

What's the difference between feedback and criticism?

Accepted Answer

Criticism is judgment ('you're bad at X'). Feedback is observation + impact ('when you skipped the PR review [situation], the bug made it to prod [impact]'). The SBI model trains you to stay observational, you describe what happened, the effect it had, then pause for their response. Criticism makes people defensive; feedback makes them curious. The shift is tiny linguistically (removing 'you always' / 'you never') but massive psychologically.

Question 2

How do I give feedback to my boss?

Accepted Answer

Upward feedback is highest-risk because power imbalance makes people defensive. Three moves: (1) Ask permission first ('Can I share something I observed?'). (2) Frame as curiosity, not judgment ('I noticed X, was that intentional?'). (3) Connect to shared outcomes ('I think it'd unblock the team if...'). Best practice: psychological safety first, work on giving downward feedback until you see people actually change, THEN attempt upward. If your boss punishes feedback, you're in a broken system (consider leaving).

Question 3

How do I receive feedback without getting defensive?

Accepted Answer

Three steps from Stone & Heen's research: (1) Listen without interrupting, your instinct is to defend. Suppress it. Say 'thanks, I'll think about that.' (2) Separate the feedback from the relationship, 'they said X' ≠ 'they hate me'. (3) Evaluate (not immediately), later, decide what's useful and what's noise. Most people fail at step 1 (they start rebutting mid-feedback). The pause is the skill.

Question 4

How do I run a blameless postmortem when someone clearly messed up?

Accepted Answer

The word 'blameless' doesn't mean 'nobody did anything wrong', it means 'we're not here to punish, we're here to learn.' Start with: 'What happened?' (facts). 'Why did our systems allow this?' (always a why, training gap, unclear spec, monitoring blind spot). 'What changes prevent recurrence?' Three questions, not 'who messed up?'. The best postmortems find that the person was set up to fail (bad process), they're usually grateful because it shifts from shame to improvement.

Question 5

Feedback in async (Slack) vs synchronous (meetings), which works?

Accepted Answer

Async works for low-stakes observations ('nice doc structure'). Sync is mandatory for critical feedback because tone is lost in text and they need chance to ask clarifying questions immediately. General rule: if there's risk of being misunderstood, do it live. Async feedback for praise (celebratory + visible), live for correction.

Question 6

How does Radical Candor differ from just being honest?

Accepted Answer

Radical Candor = care personally + challenge directly. Being honest without caring feels like an attack. Caring without challenging feels like coddling. You need both. 'Your code is garbage' (honest, zero care) destroys people. 'You're doing great!' (caring, zero challenge) leaves them stuck. 'I care about your growth, here's where you're stuck and here's how we fix it' is Radical Candor. It's about intention + delivery.

Question 7

What if someone doesn't want feedback? Can I force it?

Accepted Answer

No, forced feedback is just venting. If someone shuts down, stop. Return when trust is higher. Best practice: ask before giving. 'Can I share something I noticed?' opens the door. If they say no, respect it. Then work on rebuilding trust, ask them what kind of feedback helps them. Over time, people who feel genuinely cared for become feedback-hungry.

प्रदेश	ज्युनियर	मध्यम	सीनियर
USA	$75k	$110k	$155k
UK	£45k	£65k	£95k
EU	€50k	€70k	€100k
CANADA	C$80k	C$115k	C$160k

Feedback (Giving / Receiving)

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